[Her grip... it feels a bit weak. Noah had wondered if approaching the end of her life had affected her health in any way, but Noah can feel it now. She would hold on tighter if she could, he's sure, and that troubles him. The weight of her remaining time bears down all the more heavily on him.
The theater lights dim and the projector comes on, the movie beginning, but Noah pays it no mind. They can watch "From Skyscrapers to Sunsets: Love Blooms on the Ranch" some other time.
Noah tightens his grip on Mio's hand.]
No, I suppose it isn't. Offseeing... For a long time, I considered it my passion. My reason to exist.
[And now that reason is gone. He shakes his head.]
I'm not certain. My fingers may remember the melody, but with no means to practice, I can't say for sure. I do remember the Agnus tune, at least.
[For a long time, I considered it my passion. My reason to exist. They're seeking purpose beyond what war forced onto them, now, but he'd always been trying to touch people with his song. Mio recalls how humiliating it had been to be assigned to the Offseer rank after how hard she'd trained. No matter how differently she feels now, it seems unfair that he's the one to have had this taken away from him.
She turns sideways in her seat, the preamble of the film going ignored despite its unusual spectacle (it's just a bunch of names displaying rapidly over the picture?) in light of looking up at his face, instead.]
You really are kind. You've always been trying to reach others, haven't you? [Even when they might struggle to understand or disagree with him...it means more to him that he does it.] That's why you'll write your own music, too, one day. But in the meantime... I can probably recall the Kevesi tune until you need it.
[Trying to reach others... It's a bit embarrassing to admit, but he can't deny that when Mio knows the way he thinks. To a degree, she must understand how he feels too.
He hesitates to answer for a moment, but ultimately nods. As he scours his mind for the right words, his thumb absently traces over the back of Mio's hand.]
That's all I've ever wanted to do. But I've begun to wonder if there's a reason why I've forgotten something so vital. If I'm meant to spend my life in the service of others, why has my means of doing that been taken from me? It doesn't seem like a coincidence. I feel like... maybe I'm not meant to recall that tune.
[Because the theater is so dark, it's relatively cool - at least, it feels that way to Mio. His words are like a gusting current of hot air blown across her, though, all the warmth radiating from his thumb on the back of her hand. He's trying to turn the loss into an opportunity, isn't he? That's...good. It's good. Why, then, does he sound so lost?]
Maybe one day, once we've gotten to the bottom of everything, there won't be any need for Offseers. When there's no more fighting, no more killing each other, no more battlefields of husks to play for. [It's the only time she knows that they've ever been needed, though it's strange, how the calling had felt more important than that.]
What you want to do until that time... That should be for you to decide. Choosing for yourself doesn't mean you don't care for others.
[One of Mio's small fangs touches her lower lip, leaving a pensive dent. She thinks it would be better if he made that choice only after he had all the information. Should they let go of their memories so easily? There's been so much senseless pain, but carrying the leftover hopes and dreams shouldn't feel like a burden.]
Do you ever think about who our songs are for? The only people around to hear it are those who have heard it countless times before. They're so used to it that I wonder if our music could ever reach them.
[To be unable to reach anyone, unable to truly connect with them, is one of Noah's greatest fears. Before, he'd been content just knowing that his song held the power to set lost souls free. Before, it was enough to feel that he was doing good in the world.]
Without that... all I have are my words. If they could reach someone, anyone, and stick there in their heart, then it won't have mattered that I've forgotten how to play. I'd feel fulfilled if even one person carried my words with them forever.
[Noah exhales a sigh, only realizing he had after it's gone whistling past his lips.]
I'm sorry. I'd meant to bring you here to help you feel better, but now I've burdened you further, haven't I? You can be honest.
You haven't. If you're feeling these things, then I want to hear them. Becoming Ouroboros together only gave us a headstart. There are things we're still figuring out.
[That's why she wants to understand his position. It isn't just about working better together, but about wanting to see him smile and not hesitate. Eventually, she'll leave him behind, but until then, she'll go as far with him as she can... It's preferable to feeling like he's watching the hourglass drain over her head.
Noah's feelings may not be a burden to her, but for him to have forgotten something so ingrained... Mio's free hand lifts and curls by her face.]
But I have to wonder... do you think it's the same for more of us? Have we all lost memories? I can't think of anything I've forgotten... [She chuckles, though not with any particular humor, just at the ridiculousness of such a statement.] Now that I've said it out loud, it sounds kind of dumb.
[The problem is that he feels the weight of his own feelings more keenly with Mio than he does with anyone else. Noah has always tried to work through personal dilemmas on his own to spare his friends the unnecessary drama, but Mio...
...They may no longer be able to Interlink, but they hold parts of one another inside of themselves. If he can confide in anyone, it ought to be her. It can only be her.
Noah exhales, leaning back against the couch. What glimpses he steals of the movie are so foreign to him, almost nonsensical, and yet another reminder of how their world is truly the odd one out.]
I would imagine we're all in the same predicament. At least in our case, we may be able to recall what the other has forgotten. You may not know what gaps there are in your memory, but I will.
[Her attention is equally divided from the screen, but the occasional line of dialogue manages to filter through. Sometimes action flashes on screen that she can't fully ignore. This is how people are really meant to be. The words of that man, Vandham, ring in her mind whenever she sees something so unfamiliar pass across the screen. Is this the same? Are people really meant to live that way? Stronger than the curiosity is an ever-growing sense of longing for something she doesn't even know how to describe.]
Fair enough. We've both seen a lot of each other's memories. Even if they're hard to parse, it's better than nothing. So... I'll remember the rest for you, too, until you're ready to make a choice.
[Mio covers her chest with her free hand, a gesture of earnestness more than the Agnian salute. His doubts about being an Offseer... she can't dispel them for him. But this? She can do that much.]
[No. You have no idea how much it means to me that you've kept my memories with you.
...Noah rethinks speaking those words aloud. They're heavy, perhaps too heavy, to speak at a time like this. In lieu of words, he brings their joined hands onto his lap and squeezes Mio's tighter.]
You've done a lot for me. [More than you know.] Thank you, Mio. I think, much as I'd rather not be here, at least we're together. I'd be worrying about your whereabouts near constantly otherwise.
[Mio lets her hand be moved and leaves it there, shifting so their fingers can fully lace together.]
Me too. [Eventually, he'll have to move on - they all will - and leave her behind. For once, she's the one who thinks, we still have a few weeks, bitter and burnt as it is in her mouth. Still. Still. Like it can be comforting.]
I'm worried about the others, too, but as long as they're still together or can find each other again, I have faith that they'll be strong enough to make it through. [She leans in a little as if she's about to share a conspiracy.] Maybe they'll give your sword a new name. [They'll need it to continue the fight with Moebius for however long the two of them are gone. She has hope that they'll be able to make use of it.
She wishes she could have said goodbye to them, just in case.]
[Ah, his sword. She's never let that go, has she? Noah smiles a bit awkwardly, much of it obscured in the dimly lit room.]
If they get their hands on it, they're more than welcome to. I'm sure they'd pick a suitable name.
[And he's comfortable leaving all discussion of the sword that shall not be named alone to focus his attention strictly on the movie!! Which, speaking of that...]
...That woman is from the "big city". She couldn't be talking about the city, could she? All those towering buildings... She must be someplace different.
[Ah... now that she's learned more about that sort of thing, she needs to break the news to him as well. Mio looks a little disappointed. At least it's knowledge he can use in the future.]
Apparently, cities are common things in most worlds. There's even a man here who says he's from the City, but it doesn't sound anything like what's on Aionios.
Thousands or even millions of people all live together in them...can you imagine? It makes sense for the buildings to be so large to house so many.
They must have someone. I can't imagine not having any guidance at all.
[She watches the people mill about, some of them idle, some of them hard at work. Almost everyone on screen seems to be running on their own timeline. It's only the main woman - the one the picture keeps following - who seems about to buckle from the stress of hers.]
It looks like they have a lot of freedom to choose where and what they want to be, though.
[They all seem to be living unique lives, the central woman included, which is its own kind of mindfuck. If they aren't all working together, what are they building towards...?
The movie's just begun and already Noah is lost deep in thought. He's slow to react to Mio's statement, so thoroughly mired in all the questions circling his mind.]
Huh? Oh, right. They do. But that lady seems stressed out despite that. She has so much freedom over her own life, but she's unhappy.
[He's back to getting too deep into his thoughts again. It only took a few moments. For Mio, too, it's difficult to focus on anything beyond the stark, strange differences. Should she want a life like that one?]
I guess if you're used to it... you'll still have your own problems, won't you? Even if you're free. You must still have some expectation for how your life is supposed to proceed, especially seeing so many people go through it.
[Her head leans to the side and rests on his shoulder. Their hands are already clasped, and Mio isn't sure how else to indicate that he needn't sit alone with his thoughts like this.]
[There's entirely too much to think about, but Noah doesn't particularly mind having this much food for thought. He may end up losing sleep with all these questions knocking around in his head, but with nothing urgent to attend to in the morning, there are certainly worse fates.
Noah hums, gaze lost in the wrinkles of consternation that seem like permanent fixtures on the lead woman's face.]
I can see that. A different life doesn't necessarily mean one free of complication. Her problems are just different from ours, I'd imagine. She's fighting different battles.
[When Mio rests her temple on his shoulder, Noah stiffens, his immediate thought being that he's in her way, but... if Mio thought so, she wouldn't hesitate to nudge him over or say so. Maybe she's tired? Maybe the viewing angle is better this way?
...At any rate, he'll try not to think overly hard over that as well, relaxing his shoulders.]
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no subject
The theater lights dim and the projector comes on, the movie beginning, but Noah pays it no mind. They can watch "From Skyscrapers to Sunsets: Love Blooms on the Ranch" some other time.
Noah tightens his grip on Mio's hand.]
No, I suppose it isn't. Offseeing... For a long time, I considered it my passion. My reason to exist.
[And now that reason is gone. He shakes his head.]
I'm not certain. My fingers may remember the melody, but with no means to practice, I can't say for sure. I do remember the Agnus tune, at least.
no subject
She turns sideways in her seat, the preamble of the film going ignored despite its unusual spectacle (it's just a bunch of names displaying rapidly over the picture?) in light of looking up at his face, instead.]
You really are kind. You've always been trying to reach others, haven't you? [Even when they might struggle to understand or disagree with him...it means more to him that he does it.] That's why you'll write your own music, too, one day. But in the meantime... I can probably recall the Kevesi tune until you need it.
no subject
He hesitates to answer for a moment, but ultimately nods. As he scours his mind for the right words, his thumb absently traces over the back of Mio's hand.]
That's all I've ever wanted to do. But I've begun to wonder if there's a reason why I've forgotten something so vital. If I'm meant to spend my life in the service of others, why has my means of doing that been taken from me? It doesn't seem like a coincidence. I feel like... maybe I'm not meant to recall that tune.
no subject
Maybe one day, once we've gotten to the bottom of everything, there won't be any need for Offseers. When there's no more fighting, no more killing each other, no more battlefields of husks to play for. [It's the only time she knows that they've ever been needed, though it's strange, how the calling had felt more important than that.]
What you want to do until that time... That should be for you to decide. Choosing for yourself doesn't mean you don't care for others.
[One of Mio's small fangs touches her lower lip, leaving a pensive dent. She thinks it would be better if he made that choice only after he had all the information. Should they let go of their memories so easily? There's been so much senseless pain, but carrying the leftover hopes and dreams shouldn't feel like a burden.]
no subject
[To be unable to reach anyone, unable to truly connect with them, is one of Noah's greatest fears. Before, he'd been content just knowing that his song held the power to set lost souls free. Before, it was enough to feel that he was doing good in the world.]
Without that... all I have are my words. If they could reach someone, anyone, and stick there in their heart, then it won't have mattered that I've forgotten how to play. I'd feel fulfilled if even one person carried my words with them forever.
[Noah exhales a sigh, only realizing he had after it's gone whistling past his lips.]
I'm sorry. I'd meant to bring you here to help you feel better, but now I've burdened you further, haven't I? You can be honest.
no subject
[That's why she wants to understand his position. It isn't just about working better together, but about wanting to see him smile and not hesitate. Eventually, she'll leave him behind, but until then, she'll go as far with him as she can... It's preferable to feeling like he's watching the hourglass drain over her head.
Noah's feelings may not be a burden to her, but for him to have forgotten something so ingrained... Mio's free hand lifts and curls by her face.]
But I have to wonder... do you think it's the same for more of us? Have we all lost memories? I can't think of anything I've forgotten... [She chuckles, though not with any particular humor, just at the ridiculousness of such a statement.] Now that I've said it out loud, it sounds kind of dumb.
no subject
...They may no longer be able to Interlink, but they hold parts of one another inside of themselves. If he can confide in anyone, it ought to be her. It can only be her.
Noah exhales, leaning back against the couch. What glimpses he steals of the movie are so foreign to him, almost nonsensical, and yet another reminder of how their world is truly the odd one out.]
I would imagine we're all in the same predicament. At least in our case, we may be able to recall what the other has forgotten. You may not know what gaps there are in your memory, but I will.
no subject
Fair enough. We've both seen a lot of each other's memories. Even if they're hard to parse, it's better than nothing. So... I'll remember the rest for you, too, until you're ready to make a choice.
[Mio covers her chest with her free hand, a gesture of earnestness more than the Agnian salute. His doubts about being an Offseer... she can't dispel them for him. But this? She can do that much.]
no subject
[No. You have no idea how much it means to me that you've kept my memories with you.
...Noah rethinks speaking those words aloud. They're heavy, perhaps too heavy, to speak at a time like this. In lieu of words, he brings their joined hands onto his lap and squeezes Mio's tighter.]
You've done a lot for me. [More than you know.] Thank you, Mio. I think, much as I'd rather not be here, at least we're together. I'd be worrying about your whereabouts near constantly otherwise.
no subject
Me too. [Eventually, he'll have to move on - they all will - and leave her behind. For once, she's the one who thinks, we still have a few weeks, bitter and burnt as it is in her mouth. Still. Still. Like it can be comforting.]
I'm worried about the others, too, but as long as they're still together or can find each other again, I have faith that they'll be strong enough to make it through. [She leans in a little as if she's about to share a conspiracy.] Maybe they'll give your sword a new name. [They'll need it to continue the fight with Moebius for however long the two of them are gone. She has hope that they'll be able to make use of it.
She wishes she could have said goodbye to them, just in case.]
no subject
If they get their hands on it, they're more than welcome to. I'm sure they'd pick a suitable name.
[And he's comfortable leaving all discussion of the sword that shall not be named alone to focus his attention strictly on the movie!! Which, speaking of that...]
...That woman is from the "big city". She couldn't be talking about the city, could she? All those towering buildings... She must be someplace different.
no subject
Apparently, cities are common things in most worlds. There's even a man here who says he's from the City, but it doesn't sound anything like what's on Aionios.
Thousands or even millions of people all live together in them...can you imagine? It makes sense for the buildings to be so large to house so many.
no subject
[Everything they're seeing on screen feels so alien, but Noah can't wrap his mind around so many people occupying the same space.]
It's like each of those towering buildings is its own castle. Do you think someone is at the top overseeing everyone who lives within it?
no subject
[She watches the people mill about, some of them idle, some of them hard at work. Almost everyone on screen seems to be running on their own timeline. It's only the main woman - the one the picture keeps following - who seems about to buckle from the stress of hers.]
It looks like they have a lot of freedom to choose where and what they want to be, though.
no subject
The movie's just begun and already Noah is lost deep in thought. He's slow to react to Mio's statement, so thoroughly mired in all the questions circling his mind.]
Huh? Oh, right. They do. But that lady seems stressed out despite that. She has so much freedom over her own life, but she's unhappy.
no subject
I guess if you're used to it... you'll still have your own problems, won't you? Even if you're free. You must still have some expectation for how your life is supposed to proceed, especially seeing so many people go through it.
[Her head leans to the side and rests on his shoulder. Their hands are already clasped, and Mio isn't sure how else to indicate that he needn't sit alone with his thoughts like this.]
no subject
Noah hums, gaze lost in the wrinkles of consternation that seem like permanent fixtures on the lead woman's face.]
I can see that. A different life doesn't necessarily mean one free of complication. Her problems are just different from ours, I'd imagine. She's fighting different battles.
[When Mio rests her temple on his shoulder, Noah stiffens, his immediate thought being that he's in her way, but... if Mio thought so, she wouldn't hesitate to nudge him over or say so. Maybe she's tired? Maybe the viewing angle is better this way?
...At any rate, he'll try not to think overly hard over that as well, relaxing his shoulders.]